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The Struggles, Set Backs and Disappointments




I woke up to this sunrise on October 1st.  I can't help but wonder if September went out like a hurricane or tornado, topping off our worst garden year ever.   Although I have a good start on medicinal prep (see past post), I just woke up today feeling like a wasted so much time and money on the garden(s) this year.

It's not just weather that affects a good garden harvest, it is also life in general.  

This year has been rough.  All around.

After this year, I have been asking myself "is it worth it?" and "why do I do this to myself?"

I've even thought about getting rid of all my chickens, because no one has "time" to feed and care for them for me.  Hubby works many hours and daughter has had a TON of homework lately.  They are not laying either right now thanks to the darn roosters I obtained by buying straight run and no one interested in taking any. 

The struggles and disappointments this year have never been more real.  

We need another trip to the island(or camping trip), where I can get my mind off everything and restore some of my sanity.  Again.

Off my soap box.  Thanks for listening.  Seriously, if you stopped in to read this, thank you for visiting.



Comments

Faith said…
Beautiful sky pictures, did you notice that in the first two there is a tree, looks like a mighty pine,they resemble a cross? The dark silouette of it against the purple sky is so pretty. I know what you speak. I'm sure there are alot of us who can relate. You are in a tough, gut wrenching place for now,but you never walk alone. I hope you get to the Island, and out of your Dodge for a while, clear your mind, get away from the everyday, relax and have a celebrate life day.
Faith, yes we love that view with the tree. And thank you. We hope to get away, but boy it got cold here fast. Hoping for a bit of a warm up next week.
Debby Flowers said…
Kristina, sounds like you are in a funk - with good reason - life HAS been overwhelming lately. Remember you have been down before and this will pass. As for your garden and your chickens, you will do what is important to you and if it isn't working the current way, you will find a new way to make it work. My garden wasn't working for me either because of the full-time job plus home business - so I changed to strawbales and it's working better. It is just a matter of priorities I think. Some things that are not high priorities may have to go on the back burner for a while. I hope you do find time for your get-away, you need some peace and time to re-charge your batteries! Wishing you well!
Tracy dixon said…
I had this same problem a few years ago. I raised goats chickens and ducks for 10 years. Loved it. Grew up with it. We didnt do it out of necessity. I did it as a hobby. It took me back to child hood. However, circumstances got in the way. I was the only one taking care them and health issues pushed me back. Not to mention is was sucking all my finances up. It was a very hard decision to make, but I had to let them go. I was beginning to loose my joy in my hobby. God was speaking to me and telling me he had something else down the road. As guilty as I felt, it was a relief and freed me up. Not to mention relieved me of financial burden. The upside was I was able to put my attention on new things and refresh myself. Sometimes in life we just have to shift with changing seasons in our lives. I've learned it's a whole lot better to just buy a dozen eggs than deal with the stress. Do I miss it? Yes, but it was my time for change.
As far as our garden, I still do my gardening due to wanting to raise my own food and can it. Weve always done good except for this year. It was awful. We planted corn and the deer and raccoons got it all. So thank goodness for other farmers. We just bought enough from a local person and stocked our freezer. I was more upset over my tomatoes. The deer ate all them down. Not one tomato. I've always had success every year and been able to stock my pantries. I make spaghetti sauce, pizza sauce, enchilada sauce, salsa and just can some. Thankfully I still have some from last year. I've learned some years are going to be better than others. I always just plan for a better next year and let come what may. Hope this helps
Thank you Tracy, I did have an animal chew a hole in one grow bag and eat a few carrots, but otherwise were okay (just small, and very small). I sickens me that I didn't can a thing tomato-wise. You sound like me. I can everything tomato. Sadly we are out considering last year I only canned one thing I think.
Anonymous said…
Kristina I know what you are going through. I think we all hit a point in our lives where we have to make changes. For me it was when my husband passed. He and I worked really well together. After he died, I tried to keep up with helping the kids, looking after the garden, looking after our yard and all the things that go along with grieving, as well as listening and praying for it all. I didn’t give in easily. I did the huge garden at my daughters, I had three of the grandkids every weekend, I canned and I worked. It took me six years to finally admit to myself that it was time to give in and delete in my life. I stepped back from everything. Last year I gained a daughter-in-law as well as a much healed son. My other two kids and grandkids also healed in their grieving. My new DIL loves to can. We plan and decide what and how much to do. We did not do a garden this year as I wanted to find out how much it would cost to buy then process everything. It was pretty close to equal. We live in a cold climate. Greenhouses are virtually useless as it only gets warm enough to plant around June 1st. Then in about a week it is too hot in the greenhouse. For us it would be cost prohibitive to build one suitable. Where we all live we pay for water also. Lots of the plants need to be bought then hopefully they make it. For everything to produce here, the very last possible date to plant is June 12th. I found some wonderful organic growers where we purchased massive amounts of produce. We went you pick places. We watched sales. In the end it all worked well. We have decided though to build raised beds in both my daughters garden and my son has been informed that he will fill the backyard with raised beds. We also will add lots of fruit trees. Sorry to blather on. I hope you make the decisions that are right for you. I will in the spring also join a foraging group. Looking forward to that.
Mother Em said…
Hmmmmmmmmm namaste. This too will pass. Hoping you get a camp trip in before cold, wet fall really starts. Take a silent moment to yourself and reflect on what you have, prayers for what you've lost and believe, believe, a better day is yet to come. You have all your blog friends and family there for you.
Luludou said…
Hoping all gets settled for the best - tough décisions.
RB said…
IMO Just let the roosters out to run loose and find their own food. Sure, the road or predators might get some of them, but that's for them to watch out for. No sense feeding something that gives you no return.
God bless.
RB
<><
Thanks for that input RB, good idea.

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